Some guys can’t last more than 3 minutes without coming. If your guy is faster than a speeding bullet when it comes to coming, you can’t get your pleasure, and him coming too soon also messes with his self confidence. And then it’s just a vicious circle of speedmageddon.
To help him to last longer in bed, there are a few things you can do.
First, you have to understand that most guys have this problem because when they were teenagers, when they beat the meat, sort of speak, they weren’t concerned at all about any woman. Their main concern was doing it fast enough so that they wouldn’t get caught my “MOM!”, or their older sister! Now THAT would be a real problem!
Coming too quickly is a common problem for men – so don’t think your guy is the only one… and there are a bunch of reasons guys orgasm too quickly. Out of habit, and because of their porn addiction, just to name a few.
But that doesn’t matter now. First, it’s important that you don’t put too much negative pressure on him. He probably feels like crap already anyway – if he doesn’t, then you’re not important enough for him if he’s not thinking about fixing his problem. I mean, you shouldn’t be the one trying to fix this problem anyway… but you’re already here…
So anyway… Keep one thing in mind before adding fuel to the fire. AT LEAST he’s cumming. That’s what you should keep in mind. Only about 10% of people out there have the kind of hyped-up super-duper sex life like you see in the movies… with all the HOT action. 50% of the women out there have a problem because their guy comes TOO fast, and then the other half because their guy can’t come, rarely does, does so super hard – or is thinking about OTHER WOMEN while having sex with you. And then there are 50 Shades up and down that line…
So… if your guy can’t last long – that’s a GOOD problem to begin with. It’s a better problem than him never cumming. You know, when a guy comes – it’s a compliment. His dick LIKES you. And if he cums TOO fast (“fast” is a relative term… but anytime BEFORE you actually got to enjoy sex yourself), if he cums too fast… that means that his dick likes you TOO much. Or not. Maybe you are FAT and he is a LAZY JERK and just wants to get back to watching the game. Both options are possible. As I said, a bunch of shades there… there’s no one definite answer. So, either you are TOO hot – or not hot enough. Or the bastard watches too much porn and whacks off too often.
OK, back to the drawing board girl. Here’s what YOU can do about HIS premature ejaculation problem.
What most men do not realize or understand is that women are much different than men when it comes to sex. Men look for an excuse, and women look for a reason. Men want to have sex with every hot woman out there, and women tend to want to find “the right guy.”
But we men are evolving! And we need your help. In other words, talk to your guy. If he doesn’t care that he is not satisfying you, then of course you should dump him like a hot potato.
If he’s a good guy, then he will appreciate your openness even though it may be a bit embarrassing to him.
If talking to your man is not an option, or you simply don’t want to do it, then there are other things that you can do too…
One of the things that you can do to prolong the foreplay and get yourself in the mood is to start before him! In other words, go ahead and start to pleasure yourself first. It’s even better if he is not around. Send him pics and text and tell him that you want him. By the time he gets there, you’ll be quite ready!
If that doesn’t appeal to you, then there are other things that you can do to get him to last longer. One of the main concepts is to go slow. Take your time and make him take his time too. You need to TRAIN his cock to be erect longer. So, don’t let him get inside you immediately. Instead, tease him, on and on, keeping him on the brink. FORCE him to have foreplay basically… but don’t make foreplay in a way that you don’t give him anything. Of course not… give his cock long, sexy licks… but never put it deep down your throat (that’s for later). This will train his self-control over time. So… for the next 30 days, make foreplay mandatory (you don’t have to tell him about your plan tough).
Show him where and how you like to be touched. Don’t let him just dive in and start banging away. That’s not fair to you. The wetter you are the better, because he should force himself inside you, then your vagina is too tight and he’ll cum too quickly. On the other hand, if you’re wet like Niagara falls and he just slips inside… it will be a smoother ride and he’ll automatically last longer.
Another important thing is the “2 minute rule”… if you can get him past this point, he’ll be able to last A LOT longer. You jus have to survive the first two minutes. Those are the worst for him. How do you do that? Basically, in the first few minutes… RIDE him. Pick positions where he isn’t doing anything actively, like thrusting etc. Instead, you have to take the lead… but a very slow and steady lead.
Guide him around your body. Tell him where you like to be touched. Moan and groan up and down depending upon how it feels. Give him huge clues as to what feels good and what doesn’t. If he doesn’t know the different parts of your pussy, then show him. Lube his fingers up and guide him around your clitoris and show him how super sensitive it is when you pull the hood up. Let him slide a finger in you and feel your g-spot. Every woman is different and he needs to know that. He needs to know that it’s important for you to have pleasure and to orgasm too.
When you start to get him to slow down and pay more attention to you, then he will get his mind off of his problem and enjoy the sex a lot more too.
Great sex is about the journey before the orgasm. Teach him that because he may not even know.
In the practice of Tantra, it is all about raising the sexual pleasure as high as possible without coming, and maintaining that pleasure. Some guys trained in Tantra can go months without coming!
If you want your guy to start learning to pleasure you, show him first how you want to be treated. Treat him first to a massage where you start to use some of the principles around taking your time, raising sexual pleasure, and riding the wave of it without coming. Actually, giving him a tantric massage and training him by brining him to the edge… and then slowing down… and then back up… and like that several times… is something that will teach him a lot about self-control.
When you both get into it, you can literally have hours of sexual pleasure instead of minutes! Get him to learn to relax and get him to see the eroticism behind sexual arousal without cumming.
One great way to do this is to give him a Tantra style massage. It would be best if you had a massage table. Also, get a cream or an oil that doesn’t get absorbed too quickly.
Set the mood of the room by lighting candles and putting on music that you both like. If you don’t know how to massage, look it up on YouTube.
Here is the kicker when it comes to Tantra – if you do it right, you can give your guy a full body orgasm where it feels like his entire body is his penis! Seriously, I’ve had it done before, and it’s amazing.
Here’s how to do it:
After giving him a regular massage, tell him that you want to try to give him a full body orgasm. Tell him that you need him to tell you how close he is to coming.
So, tell him that you need him to let you know, on a scale from 1 to 10, how close he is to coming.
Next, have him turn on his back and start to stroke his cock. Pay attention to his breathing and the tension in his body. Tell him that you want him to let you know when he gets to a 6 on the scale of 1 to 10 where 10 is that he’s about to come.
When he tells you that he’s at a 6, then stop stroking his cock. Wait for him to relax for a minute of two, and then start again. But this time, tell him to tell you when he gets to a 7. When he does, stop stroking his cock again and lightly caress the rest of his body, etc.
Do it for an 8 and 9, and then finally let him come the last time.
If he came after saying that he was at a 9, that’s perfectly fine. What you are doing is training him to prolong his pleasure. You are training him to fuck you longer!
Another little technique that you can use if he is about to come and he doesn’t want to is to grasp the base of his cock and squeeze. This usually will keep him from coming. But that’s just a quick-fix, not a long-term solution to making him last longer.
Do your best to not make anything wrong or bad. Make it pleasurable and fun. Don’t approach the issue too seriously or else it will become a bigger problem than it already is.
So anyway… all of these will help you make him last longer. Another “secret” is anal sex. The thing about mind-blowing anal is that your tight anus is super-tight. So once he gets used to that grip, then some other time when you just have vaginal sex, he’ll be a lot more relaxed as the grip is looser and he doesn’t have so much pressure around his cock. Another thing – of course – perfect blowjobs. When you give him a 30-minute blowjob and don’t rush anywhere… but give him like a really sensual, deep, erotic blowjob… with little or not much use of your hands – you basically train his cock to experience amazing pleasure and you desensitize his cock. Over time, he’ll be able to last much longer.
Anyway, have fun with it… and don’t worry too much. Apply these tips for a 30 day period and I’m sure he’ll be able to last a lot longer.
Stay hungry,
your blowjob instructor,
Jack